6.16.2005

Was That A Compliment?

* As I was waiting in the parking garage for my truck to come down, a very respectable looking man in a business suit approaches me and nods his head, so I politely nod back. He casually comes over and stands next to me with a smile on his face. I don't feel threatened and he doesn't even seem like a weirdo...maybe just one of those real nice guys who doesn't know a stranger. He says "How's it going?" like we've been friends for some time. I politely say "Good. Glad the day's over." Then, he asks me if I'm an attorney. I tell him no, and he says "Really? You look like an attorney." He's being friendly and a little soft spoken...so I think he was just simply trying to strike up a conversation...maybe a new guy in town trying to meet people...but it was kind of weird. Luckily, about that time, his truck is brought to him so he says "See ya later man" and leaves. So of course, my mind is racing, overanalyzing this encounter, and I think...is that a compliment? What does it mean to look like an attorney??

* Question. Can you lose your man card if you get a pedicure? A very clean cut guy I work with admitted today that he went with his wife to get a pedicure. He said he sort of felt uncomfortable, like he was gay or something, but he actually really enjoyed it! He's definitely the metrosexual type, so maybe pedicures are ok for those types. However, picture this...I'm out in the woods somewhere with some buddies of mine, and we're all decked out in our camo hunting gear (I've never been hunting) with face paint, the same underwear we had on 3 days ago when we started the hunting trip, all carrying guns and wearing deer urine scent on our clothing...spitting in the fire, scratching ourselves, lettin 'er rip, peeing on trees...ya know, acting like guys do when the girls aren't around....and then I pull off my boot and sock and show a perfectly pedicured foot and I say "Hey guys, check it out. I got a pedicure and it truly felt sensational!" I believe I'd be staring down the end of 3 rifles listening to threats and being called names I think I'd prefer not to be called. I don't know...what do you think? Can you lose your man card over something like this?

* Last Friday night I went with my uncle to Texas Motor Speedway. WOW! I was truly in awe the entire 4-5 hours I was there. When we first arrived, Danika Patrick and the rest of the Indy cars were practicing. My eyes about popped out of my head when I saw how fast those cars drive, with such amazing skill to be going around a corner at 215MPH only 3 inches away from another Indy car going the same speed, and they don't touch each other!! It is impossible to appreciate the speeds that these cars travel from watching it in tv. Also, if you don't wear some sort of ear protection, it is so loud, I think your ears would literally be bleeding by the end of the night. We had headphones and a radio so we could hear the drivers and announcers. It was very cool! After the Indy cars practiced, we saw the NASCAR Trucks race. Man, that was so much fun!! I loved it!! Jack Sprague ended up winning (Jeff, you may be the only one who even knows who that is), but for probably 90% or more of the race, Mike Skinner was leading by a mile. I was cheering for Ron Hornaday ( I think he races for Kevin Harvick's team?? If so, I think I will start following Kevin Harvick in the Nextel. Is that respectable Jeff?). Ron started out in like 20th place, and the whole race I watched him work his way up, and he was the only car to finally beat out Mike Skinner and then stay ahead until he had to pit. Anyway...I HIGHLY recommend going to a race. It is awesome!! Bring some ear protection, and bring your own beer. It's a good thing they don't do sobriety testing when you leave the parking lot...I dont think anyone would be allowed to leave!

* Last Saturday, I took my family to Cabela's...an outdoors store like Bass Pro Shop. It is a really cool place. If you're ever in the area, set aside an hour or two to go check it out. It's fun for all ages and genders, whether you're interested in hunting/fishing/camping equipment or not. There's so much other stuff to see! They have taxidermied animals in various exhibits all over the place...and I don't mean they just stood a deer up in the middle of the aisle. It's like going through a museum. The kids loved it!! The have a stream in the middle of the store with trout sitting in the current trying to catch food to eat. It's really neat! They also have a huge aquarium exhibit you walk through and see all sorts of game fish.

* Jenn and the girls have been in Wacky Falls since Tuesday. Her dad had heart surgery to clean out one of his main arteries that was clogged over 80%. He's doing good and will most likely go home Friday. So I've been a bachelor almost the entire week. I miss my four girls (and baby Favre in the oven) and I'm ready for them to be home, but I also enjoyed the brief time at home alone. Tonight I cried. Twice. Why, you ask? Well, when I got home from work, I sat in my recliner in the living room in front of the TV and I watched the rest of the Blue Collar Comedy Tour Rides Again. Oh my gosh...that is some of the funniest stuff I have heard in a while!! Larry the Cable Guy made me cry TWICE I was laughing so hard!! I won't repeat the jokes that made me cry, but if you've seen that...you probably have an idea of what I'm talking about. I like Ron White too...I laughed pretty hard when he said his dog ran away for ten hours...gone all day long...so when he finally came home, just to piss him off, he took him for a walk!! HA! GIT 'ER DONE!!!!

7 comments:

Alyssa said...

No you cannot lose your man card for having a pedicure. In fact if you got one done you would want to make it a weekly ritual! The only way to lose your man card as far as I am concerned is to kiss or have sex with another man. As long as you stay away from such activity you will always be a man. If you decide to get a pedicure you will just be a well pampered man!

wendell said...

Getting mistaken for a Lawyer could very well be considered a compliment I think. Of course I've never had to deal with a lawyer. Congratulations. It's too bad he didn't see your truck first, he could have saved his breath. I can one-up you though, I was asked some medical questions by some ladies in a hospital elevator one time. The people thought I was a doctor. I did offer them a free exam though. On the pedicure, the simple fact that you have to ask that question tells me you are about 3 beers away from a homosexual experiementation. I would talk to your buddy at work with your back to the wall. Always use the stall with the door lock too. I'd love to see the Indy races. I bet that was great!! Now that I think about it, I think the guy in the parking garage was a queer and new you were thinking about a pedicure and wanted to ask you out. I mean a pedicure?!?! That's ALMOST as bad as a guy who dyes his hair!!! I need to check out the Cabelo's, I bet it is pretty cool. Hope Jenn's dad is well and gets weller. Tell everyone all of us said HELLO!!!

Kirk Wimberley said...

Weller? Hmm...interesting word choice.

Paige Fockler said...

Ok I agree with Alyssa you won't lose your man card by doing it. You just need to be more open minded and not be such a stereotypical guy kirk! As far as the guy goes in the parking garage it was probably a compliment because you looked polished and professional. It could also mean you looked intimidating and maybe sneaky. Take it as you will.

Jeff said...

You will lose the man card for bring up the stupid pedicure. C'mon are you kidding me - who cares what ur feet look like. Your a business man you probably have ultra white feet anyway. Good grief that guy was hitting on you - don't talk to strangers!! do what I do mumble and stare at the ground.

Jeff said...

Harvick is a piece of s***. HAHA no he's o.k. but tends to think everyone is trying to wreck him a tad immature. Later

Alyssa said...

yes I am looking for Kirk Wimberly. HAs anyone seen him? I was wondering if he fell off the face of the earth? Or maybe he just turned into a snob now that he has a high class job. Would not hurt to shout a word out to the little people every now and then!